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Monday, June 22, 2009

Paging Dr. Google...STAT!!

A few days ago I thought it would be a "nice-mommy" thing to do to walk Zachary up to the store at the head of our cul-de-sac for some ice cream. The walk started out all wrong because my OCD child wanted to walk the other direction that takes you around the cul-de-sac, instead of out of it like we always do, so it was a challenge getting him to go in the new direction. But I did and we went to the store and got some ice cream.

Since it was 900 degrees in the shade that day the ice cream started to melt down his arm faster than he could eat it, so I did what any classy mother would do... I licked it off his finger! Well I wouldn't call it "lick" exactly, but I did put his finger in my mouth, because I'm sophisticated like that. As soon as I done it my mouth instantly went numb!

Oh Crap!

I tried to remain calm, because if I am going to completely over react over something I like to at least have full use of my mouth.

We got back to the house and I done the smartest thing I could think of, I Googled "numb mouth". I was setting there staring at all the things that were hinting at my certain doom and saw Web MD and decided to look at that. It starting asking me a string of questions:

Is your tongue numb?

Well I hadn't noticed, but now that you mentioned it.

Are you experiencing one sided weakness?

You know my left side has always been a little weaker than my right!

OH SWEET JESUS!! I'M HAVING A STROKE!!

You can see where two years of Nursing School has done wonderful things for me!

So here I am a (wouldn't you like to know) year old having my first stroke! This is just GREAT! I was reading my diagnosis, trying not to drool on the computer (because being a young stroke victim I can deal with, but if I were to short out my computer with my own drool, well now I may never recover!) when I decided to get away from Dr. Google for a while and wash some dishes, because if I have to call 911 later I don't want the EMS people to look at a sink full of dirty dishes.

I start to clean the kitchen, trying to distract myself from the mouth that feels like I have been at the dentist all morning when I see it. The source of all my anguish, the reason for my numb mouth...a tube of Oragel!

Zach had fell off the couch a couple of days before and busted his lips up something awful so I had been putting Oragel on it to help with the pain. I remember that morning I let him try to put in on himself and he must of still had some on his fingers. And while preforming my ultra classy finger in mouth move I must have got some in my mouth, causing it to go numb.

I really think that Dr. Google should have thought of that, don't you?

What was the last thing that caused you to over react?

6 comments:

NanaKim said...

I am so glad you were able to find healing before we had to hit you with clot busting medication! That would have been terrible, but my goodness when you are having a "stroke" you have to have "stroke protocol". Whew!!!! Love you! Will you survive? I am beginnig to wonder!

jennie.newland said...

Well you never know it was touch and go there for a minute! But I have Dr. Google on call if I need him!

Jennifer said...

Oh my dear sweet friend... If it had really been a stroke, I would have taken care of you...but your wiping your own butt!!!

Micah said...

Yeah, I thought I had cirrhosis last week because I had a horrible taste in my mouth. Apparently I didnt get all the dish soap off the glasses.

Unknown said...

well with my oldest being diagnosed with lime disease (shes fine caught it early no lasting side effects) we have been on constant tick patrol. I got bit a few weeks ago and the bite is still there i'm still waiting for the bullseye to appear, anyway a few days ago the bite rashed out around it and i had developed an oval sized mild rash below it i freaked just knew i was then diseased. A few hours later poof it was gone "oh im healed!!" i proclaimed then i realized i had carried the wookie around an awful lot that day and it irritated the skin on my hip! Silly me darn heat rash and unconscience nightly tick bite scratching! Love your story glad it was just orajel! Your awesome!

Anonymous said...

That is hilarious. It sounds like something I would do -- I'm a slight hypochondriac. As a child, I thought I had prostate cancer.

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