Friday, May 29, 2009

Mr. Homeless Snootypants

Today me and Zach traveled to UNCA for Relay for Life. We had a great time, he even made a new friend. He had a wonderful time stomping in the mud and rolling around on the ground. I don't have any pictures of the event to post because someone stole my camera yesterday but I am waiting on Tacky Trashy Tuesday to address that one.

So, on the way home we came to the West Canton Exit(#37) where there has been a homeless man standing with the same piece of cardboard for the last 10 years. It says "Homeless and hungry. Please help. God Bless" He has been there every time I have used that exit for as long as I can remember. However, he is only there in the Summer.

Because you know people are more giving when they're delirious from heat exhaustion.

I know I may be confused enough to hand out a 20 in mid July when I can't think right due to the heat.

Ok, I'm just kidding, it would more than likley be a 10. Were in a recession you know.

Anyways, as thought not to let me down(or make me a liar, because it would kill my story) he was there today. The people in the car in front of me got out and tried to hand the guy a brown paper bag. He shook his head, handed the bag back to the stunned lady, and she got back in her car and left. I was concerned about this for about 2 seconds and preceded on my merry little way.

I stopped at a gas station a little on down the road to pick up my usual. The oh-so-sweet Starbucks Double Shot energy drink. Mocha no less, because who don't like a little chocolate in there espresso and ginseng?

I went up to pay for my few minutes of happiness, and night of insomnia, when who did I see? The lady that had tried to give the man at the corner the bag. She was talking about the ordeal to the cashier and said:

"He said that he did not like bologna sandwiches, and he wouldn't take it"

Well of coarse he wouldn't.

I mean what self respecting homeless person would steep so low as to eat a bologna sandwich?

Its good to know that if things really get so bad that we become homeless, that I will not be forced to eat tomatoes, because I hate them. Maybe someone will take pity on me and bring me a Starbucks Double Shot.


Micah Silver said...

HAHAHAHA... This was a good one. Know why? Luke buys this guy a 22oz beer on his way home each day. He tried to give him money one time, but he asked "If you could please just get me a beer. God Bless." I am not sure why luke gets him the beer, or how many other people on their "merry way" stop to give him beer. I just asked Luke why he does it, and he said because the guy is pretty driven to stand out there alllll day, and has the balls to ask for a beer that costs $2 instead of the $10 he was given. And that is why he is homeless. Instead of buying 5 beers with his $10, he would opt for luke to just go get him one. Who knows. Funny story though.

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